It’s my Life!

The month of love inspired Anzél van der Mescht to help you love your life and the people you share it with.

What is love…? (Great, now I have “baby don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more” ringing in my head. Thanks Haddaway). Anyway, back to the point. What is this thing we call love? Every day you will hear someone say “oh, I love chocolate”, but is this love, or just a very strong form of adoration?

Some things in life go by unloved, things that should be important to us remain unacknowledged, and we focus on ‘loving’ chocolate. Sure, you may just as well love candy or the colour pink, but do we proclaim our unembarrassed love for the things that really matter? My guess is no, and it is time to start.

This does not mean that love has to be confined to loving a person; one can also feel love for animals, objects and places. Love is both an action and a feeling. Every person is capable of great love and its opposite, fear, which generates painful emotions such as hate, greed and jealousy.

Yes, Valentine’s Day is usually a day of horror for most single girls and guys, but this month, to the relief of many, we shift the focus from fluffy teddy bears, red roses and chocolate hearts. We would rather you spread the love more widely and start living lovingly. By making a list of ten things for your “love list” you are well on your way to living a happy and fulfilled life.

We will help you love your life, just follow these steps and you will be merrily on your way towards bliss.

1. Fall in love. Madly, uncontrollably, head over heels. Find someone to love, who will also love you in return. The feeling of being loved and cherished is probably one of the most comforting and fulfilling feelings in the world. Don’t just love, be in love. Write notes, give unexpected gifts or kisses, walk hand-in-hand, and always tell the person how much you love and appreciate them.

1. Tell your parents and family members what they mean to you. Buy your mother a bunch of her favourite flowers and tell her you love her, or take your dad to his favourite fishing spot or restaurant. Send a greeting card to an aunt or cousin whom you have not seen in a while. Let them know that this is a gesture of love and thanks, they are sure to be pleasantly surprised.

1. Find a job you love. Do something that you are really good at and something you look forward to doing everyday. Do something for the rest of your life and don’t get tired of it. Don’t just work for the money, work for the love. Get along with your colleagues and be someone they will love to work with. You could even try your hand at something new, try being creative with this part of your love list.

1. Kiss someone you like on a first date. Throw caution to the wind, you never know what the future brings. Spend a night out on the town; forget about your troubles and the next day’s responsibilities. Take a wild leap into love and kiss your date, hold their hand and have fun in ways you don’t often do. You don’t have to pursue this person to the point of a relationship, but you will never know if you don’t try.

1. Create a home you will love. Make your house a home by adding a personal touch to rooms that are special to you. Create rooms where you can relax, rooms for fun, rooms for eating etc. Paint can make a lot of difference. If you add a splash of your favourite colour it will lift your mood and make you feel good about the space you have created. The idea is to create a home that you will look forward to going back to after a long day at work.

1. Go skinny dipping with your partner. Re-ignite the spark by doing something that will make you feel like a teenager again. By acting impulsively and having unplanned fun once in a while, you could reconnect with your partner on a romantic level. Have a glass of wine or champagne before the occasion to get you into the loving mood.

1. Learn to love yourself. Love your body, love your style, love your voice, love your personality. Try to recognise the areas of yourself that need some work and go for gold. Lose a little weight if you want to, buy some new clothes, try a different haircut or use a different lipstick. Finding inner peace with yourself and your circumstances will definitely give you a nudge in the right direction. Embrace the new you and show it off to the world.

1. Live in a city you love. Choose to move to a city where you have always wanted to live. Be it to a city where you can see the mountains, bright city lights, see the ocean, the rivers, the wildlife, attend parties or make bucket loads of money. South Africa offers so many beautiful places to call home so take a risk and make a move towards living a lovely life.

1. Learn to love exercise. There really is so much to choose from, exercise need not be a nightmare. Whether you like something fast-paced, something that relaxes the body while working out, or something sportier, there is sure to be something you will love doing to keep you in top shape. The great thing about exercise is you can do it almost anywhere – no expensive gym contract needed. It is also easy to stay motivated if you have a partner to do it with. So, grab your friends and hit the road!

1. Buy an item of clothing that you love. We all have that one piece we absolutely have to have, be it a dress or a pair of shoes we stare at through the shop window, envying the mannequin for weeks, until it is eventually replaced by something that simply does not match up to your favourite. It is time to buy something you have been pining after and wear it with pride.

So if you feel it in your fingers, and you feel it in your toes (O.K this has to stop. Now I’m quoting Smokie!), you will know it is love! Love life, but remember it usually starts with you. Deep inside you is a flaming desire to love and be loved, never be afraid to explore that side of life.

“Do something that you are really good at and something you look forward to doing everyday... Don’t just work for the money, work for the love.”

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